I was a TV researcher for several years. As well as being mind-blowingly fascinating, it’s a strange and often stressful job. You are, in effect, the personal concierge to the uniquely demanding creature that is the TV producer (I later became one of those too, so feel I can speak freely) and it is your job to fulfil his or her every creative whim.
You must interpret the weird, cosmic ordering – ‘I need a man who is so addicted to gambling he wears nappies! By five o’clock! Plus a kilo of moon rock!’ – and bring back each bizarrely specific item on the list. Given that your job depends on it, you get pretty good at making items materialise out of thin air that one might have believed did not actually exist at all.
This is a skill that comes in particularly handy when the ‘sexualisation of children’ story rolls around again, usually in response to another government review on the subject (there have been five separate re